Whether you are in a new relationship or you are approaching your fifth anniversary, there is a wide variety of tips you can follow to improve your role in your relationship. To be a good girlfriend, you have to be receptive and sincere with your partner, meet their wants and needs, and be willing to show your love and affection. Keep in mind that you should also strive to maintain your independence in order to enjoy a healthy relationship.
Method1: Be open
One Do not be too open in the first days. Starting a relationship is about making sure there is enough room for the two to get to know each other and trust that they are for each other. If you try too soon to do more of the relationship than it is, this pressure can scare you and ruin what could have been a good thing. Instead, be patient and keep in mind that it takes time to build a lasting and solid relationship. If you want to be a good girlfriend, avoid the following things:
- Do not pressure him to classify his relationship very soon. You will not have to call yourself a girlfriend after a couple of dates, because maybe you make him feel that it was not his decision. Be patient and let him decide when to use phrases like taking things seriously, having an exclusive relationship, being serious, etc. If you are compatible with him, your relationship will develop soon.
- Do not start talking about marriage and starting a family before you even meet your close friends and parents. Talking about these issues at the beginning can create tension from the beginning, which can stop or even end what could be an affectionate and productive relationship.
- Do not feel the need to show off or impress him. You do not need to prove anything, you just need to be present and willing to listen, be attentive and share your interests.
Two Be honest . Being honest with your partner is very important, to the point of being essential, and it is equally important that you be honest with yourself . If you exaggerate or make a mistake, you can recognize it and apologize . If you feel vulnerable or upset, you can sort your feelings and comment on them in a non-accusatory way .
- The most important thing here is to be as open as possible about your feelings. For example, if he does or says something that bothers you, be open about how it affects you, without accusing him or asking him to change.
- If you establish solid communication from the beginning, you will know faster if the relationship will last or fail.
3 Say what you think . Do not be afraid to make your wishes, your needs and your opinions known, even when they may create a conflict. You do not have, and you should not, only please it. In addition, showing that you are unique with your needs, desires and focus of life will keep you interested in knowing and understanding you as a person. If you feel comfortable saying what you think, then he will feel the same way doing it.
- Just remember to express yourself in a way that does not offend someone’s opinion or lifestyle in any way, since you can be humbleand frank at the same time using strategies of assertiveness and also considering their feelings.
4 Be yourself . Do not be false just to impress him. It may be tempting if you think you would prefer a different type of girl, but usually this is improvising insignificant things said or suggested, and you are probably wrong. After all, he wants to go out with you and not with some imagined form of perfection. But, if you really feel tempted to change things about yourself because he insists that you would be better skinnier, taller, prettier, quieter or whatever, then it is a good indicator that they are not compatible.
- If he tells you such things in a persistent and annoying way, then it is not love, but an attempt to control you.
- Do not pretend that you share your interests if it is not like that. It may seem fun or “safe” to do so at the beginning, but it will be extremely hurtful for him when he finds out that you do not really love what he does, since he may be basing his thoughts on your role in his future in something that is not real. and it will end up hurting both of you.
Method2: Be encouraging
One Shows interest in what he likes. Remember what he likes to do and what he likes to talk about. You do not have to act as if you love his hobbies, but at least try to understand why he is such a fanatic. If you love a band, try to understand why; If you like to be restless and immature, remember that maybe it’s your way of releasing stress. By learning to accept your unique way of being, you will also learn more about yourself and know if you see yourself living with it for the rest of your life.
- You do not have to be interested in everythingyou like. For example, if you like to watch baseball but you can not get familiar with that, that’s fine too.
- Simply asking him about his interests and talking about the things that matter to him may be enough.
Two Learn to work in a team. As in any healthy relationship, you will experience conflicts, some small and others big. Remember to be yourself and try to avoid any significant selfishness. A relationship is based on team work and something symbiotic, not parasitic, where one part gives and the other only receives without giving much in return. In a couple, both parties receive, do not discredit each other and appreciate each other in front of each other.
- In difficult times, a team approach can help solve problems in a less emotional way, in which both assume responsibilities to fix the situation instead of waiting for the other to do so.
- Avoid having a “one way” relationship in which the link revolves around only one thing. Maintain your strong relationship by providing variety and diversity by trying new and different things. In relationships you have to have fun together, learn together and grow together.
3 Deliver it more than you criticize it. If everything you say is a criticism or an aggression, you will not expect to see yourself again and will reconsider being with you. However, you also do not always have to agree with him because he is your boyfriend. Discretion is a better strategy in mature relationships, and establishing links and engaging are important strategies that must be learned and adopted.
- Although you can say a valid criticism when you think it’s right, you have to tell it at least four positive things for every negative thing you say.
- Do not bother him just because you’re in a bad mood or because things are not perfect.
4 Learn to commit yourself. If you want to be a good girlfriend, then you have to learn to commit yourself instead of fighting or getting angry when you do not have what you want. To commit well, both have to be able to talk rationally and calmly about a situation while understanding the perspective of the other person. Try to understand what your partner’s point is, instead of concentrating blindly on what you think you need.
- You do not want to be that kind of girl who always gets away with it just because her boyfriend prefers to give in instead of standing firm because you get angry and upset so much that things are not what you expect.
5 Have your space. You have to support him, but also be able to be with him in spirit when they are not together. If you want to be a good girlfriend, you have to have your time to do your own things, to go out with your friends, and to see your partner. You have to know that you are thinking about her and that you support her even when you are not around. If you feel insecure and doubt the strength of the relationship as soon as they are far away, then you have a problem.
- You have to support your partner if you want to go out at night with your friends, instead of trying to get involved. It is important that you let your partner spend time with their friends and leave without you.
- If you feel you have the right to all your time and attention, learn not to be obsessive; You do not have to be a very protective girlfriend, let it go without you feeling watched.
- Remember that you do not need everything and that you are two separate people at the same time that you are a couple. When you need a little space, do not take it personally (acknowledge it for what it is) your time to rejuvenate and share different interests with others. But, make sure he knows you will always be there for him.
Method3: Be adorable
One Be loving There are several ways to show your affection, some are more obvious than others, and the way you do it depends on how open affectively you are. Affection is similar but not equal to intimacy, affection is to show that you care at any time of the day or night, publicly or privately. Think about how you like to show affection to the people you love, for example, taking them by the hand, touching their arm, giving them quick kisses on the cheek, giving them a hug, stroking their hair, telling them words of support, mentioning how great they are in front of other people, etc.
- Affectionate names like “sweetie” or “sweetheart” are a sweet way to show your affection to your partner, but try not to exaggerate, as it can be little stimulating to call him “gentle bear baby”, especially in public. Of all things, good communication is the essential part of any relationship, so make sure you know how much you want it.
- Very affectionate texts and emails are often a plus, but sending too many will become overwhelming and sticky. This kind of thing shows you that you like it and that you want the relationship to last forever, but do not hurry so much that you scare it!
Two Be seductive Do not be afraid to be seductive. Most people find it irresistible when a girl is sexy, smart and confident. Safety means being happy with yourself. You will emit this trust without straining if you accept yourself and feel sure of how much you are worth. You do not have to strive to be the most popular and full of life if that is not your style; instead, it gives the best of you, taking care of you and trusting that you are worth your attention.
3 Make gifts. When you have a relationship, it’s fun to give yourself small gifts to each other. We all love to receive gifts and if you make one, you show him that he means a lot to you. Do not exaggerate, just give him gifts when you feel affectionate and you want to let him know how much you care, since you do not want him to think you’re trying to buy his love.
- Prepare something by hand. A paper flower, an artistic heart, something creative that reflects your personality so that when you see it think of you and smile. If you are the kind of girl of the musical type or you play an instrument, play one or two songs (if you play a song that you wrote are extra points). You can add a private video of your song on YouTube.
4 Do not be jealous. You have to be affectionate but not to the point where you start to get mad either talk to her, or even mention, another girl. Nothing will bother your partner faster than being a girl so insecure that she can not stand the idea that there is another woman in the universe. On the contrary, she will appreciate more if you are friendly with her friends, instead of saying how ugly or annoying is any girl you see.
If you go out with your friends, do not send text messages every two seconds to make sure you are not talking to other girls, as this will make you see how little you trust him.
- Do not let your friends manage your relationship, as it is yours and no one else’s. Of course, everyone can have their opinion, just as you have about their relationships. The point is that you do not have to listen to all the advice your friends give you if you do not want to, keep in mind that sometimes it is due to their incompatibilities with your boyfriend, which is fine because everything does not have to be perfect. Just listen to them and ask them to try to get along with him.
- Appreciate all the good things in your relationship. Men feel comfortable when they’re appreciated, do not you? Learn to thank him for the things he does, even if that means thanking him for taking you home. All the things he does for you show the respect he has for you. Not all women have a good relationship, so appreciate yours.
- Never let anyone tell you how to live your life, let alone your boyfriend. Do not let it press you, be open with things, including the impact of any requirement that expresses. Similarly, do not tell him how to live his life either.
- Let him know that he is right when he has it. This is a great confidence generator, as well as admitting that you are responsible when you are going to blame is a good way to set aside the conflict in a relationship. Learn these skills fast and you will have the basis of a strong and shared relationship.
- Try to get along well with your family and friends. These are the people who matter most to you, therefore, if they tell you good opinions about you, it will mean a lot to him. Try to make friends with your friends (as) and their brothers (as). Be respectful to your parents and try to please them. Do little things like becoming an accomplice of your mother or going shopping with your sister.
- Do not try to change it. Just let him know what you like and if he loves you he will try to do it next time. If it is very different from the person with whom you aspire to share your life, consider the possibility of looking for that person and seeing this relationship as a learning opportunity.
- Understand that all relationships are different and that there is no universal way to be a good girlfriend, because everyone has different interests.
- If your boyfriend acts passively in relationship, it does not mean that he does not love you, but maybe he is shy or introverted. Maybe he was never in a relationship and he does not know how to react, or maybe he’s not the kind of person to shout from the rooftops, but still he can have deep feelings for you. Talk to him about why he acts like that and be understanding. It is possible that I am waiting for you to take the initiative because you had more experience in relationships than him, or maybe it is his way of being and you need to get used to it.
- They should talk about any problem they may have, and solve it as a couple. This person should take care of you and spoil you, just as you do with her.
- If your boyfriend is new, you should not press him at all. Otherwise, you may feel that you are using it.
- Jealousy is a very dangerous emotion. Do not make him jealous intentionally because it will end up affecting long-term trust.
- Do not feel insecure about your appearance. If he wants to go out with you, obviously he thinks you’re attractive
- Do not compare your current partner with a previous one. Nobody likes this kind of comparison, even if your goal is to make your current partner look better. They will not be identical, and you have no right to judge people in relation to what resembles them. Instead, reflect on how much the current relationship works for you in the present.
- Do not be annoying, that is, do not call him constantly, do not get mad when he spends time with his friends, do not demand him to spend more time with you, do not whine, do not complain about other people all the time, do not ask for recognition time (for example, do not always end your sentences saying “do not you think?”), etc.
- Never flirt with your friends! No matter how cute you seem, you need to show him that he is the only man for you. If you feel the need to flirt with them, that indicates that you are not ready to have a monogamous relationship.
- Never lie. Not only must you be honest, but transparent with all things. Do not leave anything without saying, even if it may seem strange, because it can cause problems in your relationship. There is something called lying by omission; Sometimes you have to say something to clarify the situation, since not doing so can lead you to think badly.
- It’s okay to tell your friends about things, but remember to be respectful and avoid commenting on things that are embarrassing, confidential or rude. (Do not reveal your romances!) You can keep your friends updated on how the relationship is going, but avoid getting involved in it; Unless he is abusing you or other things are happening, in which case you have to tell them everything and allow them to help you quit. But, if you decide to share intimate information with them, he has to know and have authorization to do the same with his friends. Do not let me speak of you as an object.
- Do not do secret tests with your boyfriend to see how he would react because it is humiliating, disrespectful and unfair. Also, you would not want him to do the same with you. The same happens when you press your boyfriend to have sex.
- Do not check your phone unless he agrees. Expect the same from him.
- Recognize the difference between constructive criticism and criticism that simply ruins a person’s personality because you would prefer them to act differently.
- He will want a little space from time to time, so you should not offend him if he asks.